"In My Mind"

to tare down this stone wall.
But I seem to rouin it all.
In my mind I´ve hated
me, myself, and it all.
In my mind I´ve tried,
for me to be in control of it all.
All my life I´ve waited,
to see happy times,
that never seem to come.
In my mind I´ve pictured,
a life of being normal.
In my mind I´ve had a feeling,
of beeing free.
Will it ever be?
Just In My Mind?