Tilbake Tilbake: Angst

Just stop

It wasn't my fault...

Why me? What did I do?
Did I signalise something? Did I show signs of agreement?
I didn’t. Now, why am I being blamed?
Why are you mad at me? Stop yelling.
“You should’ve punched him”
“You should’ve stopped him”
“You should’ve moved”
Yeah, I know I should have done something.
But I didn’t dare.
I was scared. I was tired. I was afraid. I felt betrayed.
I felt like crying. I didn’t dare to move.
How could I? I was frozen in fear.
Why are you mad at me? Wasn’t I allowed to feel scared?
Why are you blaming me? Do you think I wanted this to happen?
I was sleeping. I woke up by it. How could it be my fault?
I was used. Against my will. How in the heavens is that my fault?
Sure, you all say that if it were you, you would have stopped it.
I would like to see you in my shoes.
If you haven’t been in such situations before it may seem easy to prevent.
But when it have happened before, you just feel like giving up.
It feels like you don’t have any real purpose.
It wasn’t the first time. Trust me.
I’m a mess. I don’t know how to handle it.
Why are you still mad? Do you still think it’s my fault?
Yes, I know I could’ve stopped it.
Stop telling me that.
Yes, I know I did nothing.
Stop yelling at me.
Yes, I am crying. Why, you ask?
Because you’re yelling at me for something I didn’t do.
No, I don’t want your advice.
Just stop.

Til forsiden